Awesome birthday! Up for work at 5am tomorrow. #itainteasybeingreasey #cafelife
They say if you give a man a fish, he’ll eat for a day. But if you teach a man to fish…. then he’s got to get a fishing license, but he doesn’t have any money. So he’s got to get a job and pay taxes, and now you’re gonna audit the poor cocksucker because he’s not good with math.
So they’ll pull the IRS van up to your house and take all your shit. And you were just worried about eating a fucking fish, but you couldn’t ever cook the fish because you needed a permit for an open flame. Then the Health Dept. is going to start asking you a lot of questions about where you are going to dump the scales and guts. And ladies and gentlemen, if you get sick of it all at the end of the day, it’s not even legal to kill yourself. - Doug Stanhope
ohhhh my gosh
We shot 5 looks today. ALL of them #starwars themed ❤❤❤
I still can wrap my head around how hot Elegy Ellem is…
I’m currently making an Arrested Development-themed game using the Happy Wheels level editor. It doesn’t follow the storyline exactly, but it will feature of references to individual episodes. The level will be simple yet fun and hilarious: play as G.O.B., steal the Bluth Company Stair Car, drive from the model home to the corrections facility, kill White Power Bill, find Pop-Pop, avoid obstacles, do
tricksillusions off of ramps and jumps, and evade Hot Cops, Real Cops, and your brother Michael as you make your way through Orange County to the Banana Stand on the Pier. If you’re lucky, You’ll chart a southbound course and make it to Portugal in one piece.
—Wings & Strings
[submitted by wings-and-strings]
Goddamn I’d play that game!